So I am not dead, got abducted by
aliens or disappeared off the face of the earth due to the reaping. I took a month off from blogging mostly
because babies are a lot of work and I needed a break. But I am back now. A lot happened during the month I was away,
some good and other things not so much.
I have always had a theory about the month of August, mostly that it
sucks and it is a fucked up month. This year it proved to be no different.
Let me start with the good news
first. Last week we got the great news
that our adoption of our son was approved by the court and that our son is now
legally ours. Nobody can take him away
from us anymore which is a good thing because that would have had to happen
over my cold dead body. He has been such
a joy in our lives and it feels like we have always had him. It is strange how quickly one adapts to
parenthood and how it seems as if there is just this parental switch that gets
flipped in your brain and parenting just comes naturally. Not that it is by any means easy.
Michael started teething and his
first tooth is out. This happened with a
lot of tears, tantrums and the flu.
All-in-all I now have a healthy dislike of teeth. Teething is a painful experience for all
involved. One of the hardest things is
when your son cries after he had his medication and teething gel and nothing
seems to be working. Eventually all you
are left to do is hold and comfort him which makes you feel helpless and like a
bad parent. There were also the odd
occasions where I cried with him and every time that happened our son would
give me this look that says “What the
fuck is wrong with you. I am the one in
pain here.” But we made it through
the first one, now there are nineteen left to go. God help us.
This month was also a month of
tragedy for our zoo. We lost two more
pets this month. Earlier in the year our
oldest cat passed away due to a stroke.
Now earlier this month our angora bunny died from blood cancer and on
Sunday Nikita, the matriarch of the house, passed away from organ failure due
to old age. It feels like death has been
doing the rounds in our street this month.
Our neighbor’s son also committed suicide by shooting himself in their
garden. It’s all very tragic and it has
been a shitty start to a shitty month.
Luckily we are half way through Hell Month and let’s just hope that
nothing else bad happens.
Everyone in our household has
also had the flu and as luck will have it mine doesn’t want to go away. As I sit here I feel like death warmed up and
like the CDC should come and decontaminate our house before my flu evolves into
becoming the Ebola virus. I caught the
flu from our son due to exposure. And
with exposure I mean that Michael was a little snot factory and inadvertently
some of the snot must have ended up in my mouth. Gross I know.
Babies can be assholes like that.
Also, nobody told me how dirty babies can be and perhaps that is a good
thing. If they are sick everything is
covered in snot mixed in with the occasional vomit. And when they vomit they usually do it on
you. I can’t remember the last time I
was 100% clean.
One good thing that happened
since we got our son is that my OCD has gotten better albeit unintentionally. You see after you have been vomited on, peed
on and been shit on a couple of times you become somewhat immune. Also, our lounge is constantly in a varying
state of chaos with toys being scattered everywhere. I localized the chaos by buying Michael a
playpen or as I like to call it – a baby jail.
This has two advantages: 1. The chaos is centralized and contained; and 2. Michael can’t get out of it which
means I can go to the bathroom alone.
Finally, a couple of weeks ago I
was diagnosed with “Bipolar Disorder not
otherwise specified”. As some of you
know I have been battling depression my whole life and I always suspected that
I was Bipolar. But sailing down the
river of denial is more pleasant than facing the reality. My psychiatrist finally put all the pieces of
the puzzle together. My chronic
insomnia, OCD, social phobia, depression and my hypomania were all classic bipolar
symptoms. Luckily for me I suffer from the
milder form of the disorder and I prefer to view it as my eccentricity because
mental illness sounds so vulgar.
As you can see the last month was
no picnic. No wonder I didn’t get around
to blogging. Had I done so the blog
posts would have been even more depressing than this one. Nobody likes to read about death and
depressing shit besides the people who do because they want to feel that their
lives are not so bad in comparison. And
people like that are assholes and you know who you are. Hopefully things will get better from here
and that our remaining pets will not die, the other nineteen teeth will be less
traumatic than the first, no more people I know will kill themselves and that
my mood will stay stable. Now cheer up
and go do something fun.
Till next time.
