2013: The Year that Was

So today is the last day of 2013 and I slept for 10 hours straight.  The last time I did that was when I had plastic surgery and the drugs were awesome.  And just so you know, the bags under my eyes have still not grown back.  That is a plastic surgery win in my book.  But this blog post is not going to be about me being nipped, tucked, getting laser treatment or getting Botox.  I am saving that for my forties.  The nip and tuck part that is because the rest I have been doing for years.  This blog post is going to reflect on the highs and lows I have experienced during 2013.  Seeing as I live a very boring life this blog post is going to be short.  I don’t want to bore you with all the insignificant details that make out the plethora of my meager existence.  So like the time when I worked in intelligence and had to write boring reports for politicians who were too lazy to read I will make it concise and hope it doesn’t give you a sudden urge to take a nap.  So here goes…

Like most years I like to start off the year being all optimistic, you know, making up silly New Year’s resolutions that nobody ever stick to.  New Year’s resolutions like “this year I am going to live healthy, exercise and lose weight”.  Yea right.  Well I did not do any of that and I should really be ashamed of myself.  In 2013 I gained 8kg and, like I like to see it, it is just more of me to love.  In 2013 we also learned what gay guys really think about vaginas and it really should not have come as a surprise that most of us are terrified of them.  I mean we all know that if it wasn’t for vaginas we would not be here but that doesn’t mean that we would want to revisit one, now do we?

On Valentine’s Day one of my far flung family members shot and killed his girlfriend and an international media circus started.  Oscar Pistorius shot and killed Reeva Steenkamp, a woman very few of us ever heard of before this.  Being sad and of great media interest the attention seeking homophobic Pastor from Cape Town also wanted his five minutes of fame and stated publically that Oscar was cursed for supporting gay rights.  Naturally I lost my shit over this a little, but they say you should take it from whom it comes.  Something I sometimes find hard to do.  This year I also realized that Google is making us stupid.  These days there really is no need to learn anything.  If you want an answer to a question you just ask Google; if you want to be shown how something is done you ask YouTube.  As technology evolves making life easier for us we as a human race are becoming ever lazier both mentally and physically.

This year I also had a rather unpleasant encounter with a drag queen that lost her mind.  I answered some questions straight people always wanted to ask a gay guy and gave you reasons why I don’t want to friend your cock.  And in an even stranger turn of events my cat almost got her own book deal.  This year also saw me coming to terms with menopause.  My own menopause!  I. Almost. Died.  I was diagnosed with early onset male menopause earlier this year and was started on hormone therapy.  Luckily, or unluckily, I have not yet grown a second dick yet but the hormones did see me grow some extra man hair.  Luckily there are wax as I don’t think I will rock the cave man look.

My long suffering husband and I also celebrated our 15^th year anniversary this year.  That’s like 40 in straight years.  I also shared some stuff I do that annoys my husband which makes our 15 years together so amazing.  This year was also a turning point in our relationship with us making one of the biggest decisions a couple can make and that is to have children.  This year we started with the adoption process.  It was a huge step to take and a somewhat arduous journey but we are looking forward to becoming a family of three in 2014.  I know looking forward to 2am feeds, nappy changes, being thrown up on and many sleepless nights are not something most people get excited about.  But hey, you all know I am different and I am super psyched about it and you can be sure to read all about poop, formula, sleep deprivation and all that goes along with new parenthood on my blog in 2014.

During 2013 I not only dealt with the lighter side of life but also with some of the darker sides.  I wrote about addiction and how I have been personally affected by it and why I have not had any contact with my father for the last six years because of it.  I also shared with you my dirty little secret with my life long battle with depression and why sometimes wallowing in self-pity can be liberating.  I also dealt with religious inspired homophobia which is something I hope I will see disappearing in my lifetime as well as how the gay community can inspire hate and discrimination amongst ourselves.  Also during 2013 I hit a low point in my blogging career where I briefly wondered whether I should not just quit my blog.  But as you can see I pulled through my blogging slump and am still here.  We also lost a great man this year.  Nelson Mandela passed away and he was a man from which I drew great personal inspiration and he will be greatly missed but never forgotten.

2013 was by no means an easy year.  Looking back over the last twelve months I am amazed at how much I grew both personally and spiritually.  As I sit here writing this I am aware that I am almost at the beginning of what will be a new chapter in my life.  2014 will be a year of change, challenges, inspiration and great joy.  We will be welcoming a new member into our family and I am sure our priorities will shift.  2013 has taught me patience, the importance of resilience, focus and that change is a good thing.  So on this last day of 2013 I am not going to make any silly New Year’s resolutions, what I am going to do is make a promise to myself:  I promise that in 2014 I will be the best version of myself that I can be, accept myself and all my flaws and embrace life.

Till next time.

Prevent the Zombie Apocalypse

So I might be over exaggerating about the Zombie Apocalypse being upon us.  Please don't panic.  It. Is. Not. Real.  But it totally could be.  One day.  In which case you can panic and stay the hell away from me.  I know how to use a gun and I am not afraid to use it. Also, if there is a Zombie Apocalypse I will totally steal your shit in order to survive because apocalypses really brings out the worst in people. If you don't believe me just watch The Walking Dead seasons 1-3.  But this is not what this blog post is about (for now at least).

This year I have again, against my better judgement, decided to enter the 2013 SA Blog Awards.  I always enter these things but never win.  I totally have low self-esteem because of it y'all.  I may even start drinking or abusing prescription medication as a result.  And this year there wasn't a category that completely fit my blog but that did not stop me either.  In the past I was a runner up in the categories for best LGBT blog (it no longer exists), Most Controversial Blog (it no longer exists) and most recently for Best Political Blog (it may possibly also no longer exist in 2014, because I am noticing a trend, don't you?).

So this year I got entered for Best Political Blog and Best Lifestyle and Entertainment Blog.  Both categories kind of fit my blog if you squint your eyes and have downed six tequila shots.  Look, I am not complaining.  I will take it where I can get it because I am a blogging and social media whore like that. AND I NEED YOUR HELP.  I need you to vote for my blog.  Your vote will mean a lot to me and could possibly help me at least make it into the Top 3.  Your vote could prevent me from developing a drinking problem and/or becoming Xanax and Codeine addict.  You don't want that to happen to me, do you?

So here is what you can do.  Please click on the Pink Vote For Me picture below.  It will then take you to the website to vote.  Select both categories and provide your email address and press submit.  They will then send you a vote conformation email and when you get it click on the link to confirm your vote.  It is that easy.  Voting closes on this Friday the 13th at midnight C.A.T.  

 

Nelson Mandela a World Icon

With Nelson Mandela's passing last night I have decided to repost this blog post I wrote about him.  He has touched so many lives, changed South Africa for the better and he will be missed but always remembered.

Some generations are fortunate to be part of historic moments, moments so profound that it changes to course of history and the path of a nation. For some these historic moments are tragic like the events that unfolded on 9/11 and most people remember where they were and what they were doing when the planes hit the twin towers. For others historic moments are joyful and fill one with hope. It's been more than 20 years since Nelson Mandela’s release from Victor Verster Prison that was the beginning of the end of Apartheid. More than 20 years ago Madiba took his first steps as a free man after serving 27 years as a political prisoner and would continue on his march to free a nation.
I vividly remember that Sunday of 11 February 1990 when Mandela was released. I was 12 years old at the time but did appreciate that the release of Mandela was a momentous occasion that would change the course of history in South Africa. At the time South Africa was in a national State of Emergency which meant martial law was applied and enforced by the military and many civil liberties were temporarily taken from us - we were not living in a democratic country. Much fear still existed and the African National Congress (ANC) was still viewed as a terrorist organization even though they had been unbanned. When Mandela emerged from prison all knew change was coming and this provided hope. His first speech signified a new era, a new path and the birth of a new nation.

Sitting in front of our television Mandela’s distinct voice said “I greet you all in the name of peace, democracy and freedom for all”. He appeared strong and focused but uninfluenced by his iconic status. “I stand here before you not as a prophet but as a humble servant of you, the people. Your tireless and heroic sacrifices have made it possible for me to be here today. I therefore place the remaining years of my life in your hands.” He ended his speech by quoting himself during his trail in 1964, quite appropriate as this was the words he spoke before being imprisoned and with these words he would leave “I have fought against white domination and I have fought against black domination. I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die.”
After Mandela’s release he worked tirelessly so see his ideal for South Africa come to fruition. With the first democratic election in 1994 an uneasy partnership was established between him and the then president FW De Klerk. Having been enemies they now had to work together and the apartheid regime had to relinquish power and make way for democracy. Seeing the country change was tremendously exciting. I saw and lived in history. However, not all South Africans took well to change.

The birth of our democracy saw many labour pains and the birth was difficult. I remember my grandmother one day telling me not to play with my black friends when she was there visiting. I was shocked and angerd by her remark but came to realize that not all South Africans readily accepted change as easily as others. Certain generations would cling to old ideologies and would actively resist progress. Some generations would never accept that the beliefs they were indoctrinated with was wrong.
In the years to follow Mandela received many awards most notably the 1993 Nobel Peace Prize which he shared with FW De Klerk. An award he is most deserving off. Countless people lost their lives, got maimed by bombs and wear scars of torture on both sides of the battle; together with De Klerk he brought peace to a country that was on the brink of collapse. People were finally free and the civil war was over. I remember watching smoke rise from a bomb explosion in Pretoria, having had to evacuate shopping centres due to bomb scares and not being allowed to go out in the city at night due to fear. I remember seeing images of murder and violence. I remember reading signs that read "Whites Only" and I was relieved that all of this was now in the past.

Now more than 20 years later South Africa is no longer the same country Mandela saw when he left the gates of Victor Verster Prison. South Africa no longer is a country divided along racial lines and democracy has prevailed. However, South Africa still has its problems: We still battle with crime, curbing the rate of HIV and AIDS and there still are pockets in society that are racists. In spite of this, when I look at the next generation I am proud of the legacy Mandela has helped us leave behind. Children today don’t see the color of their friends’ skin; they don’t distinguish between rich and poor and they were born free of oppression and hate. Yes, we still have much to do to leave our country better than the way we found it but Nelson Mandela can be proud that he lived to see and achieved the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities and rights.  Rest in peace Nelson Mandela, you will be missed and never forgotten.

Till next time.

20 years since Nelson Mandela's release from prison