Flu and the peeing Buddha

I love the rain, but delight turned into dread as we have been drenched for the last few weeks. The fluctuation in temperature combined with me forgetting the one golden rule my mother taught me (make sure you are dressed warm) caused me to catch the flu. I absolutely hate being sick! The last time I had the flu was 5 years ago. Between coughing, sneezing, general body aches and fever I was in denial until a simple maneuver with my car ended up with me scratching my bumper against a pole. Staring at the white paint of the pole on the black paint of my car and calculating in my head how much the repair will cost, it finally sunk in – I am sick and must see the Dr!

It was confirmed, I indeed had flu. He prescribed the usual treatment and 2 days of bed rest. Clearly the Dr forgot I am a Type A personality and asking me to stay in bed is like asking the pope to go to a rave club. I can not lie in bed for 2 whole days, I’d go insane. They say men become like babies when they are sick. In my case that holds very true. When ill I have a very short fuse, need to be loved, pampered, cuddled and have things carried after me and done for me, or else I sulk or display menopausal mood swings. Flashes of fever makes me feel like I am taking mini tropical holidays to hell and the coughing resemble the sounds of crazed demons you’d expect to find there.

Having 2 days of “bed rest” I became very creative in passing the time. Besides trying to sleep (I am a chronic insomniac), surfing the net and watching TV (which takes very little physical exertion) I also ventured into the strange world of Chinese teas. A friend of ours recently returned from China and brought my husband I a goody bag, which included amongst other things, a peeing Buddha and Chinese flowering tea. There is a whole ritual to preparing the perfect cup of tea; a ritual that took me just over 3 hours to master and an utter loathing for a small ceramic little fat man.

The ritual seems straightforward. First, you have to soak your ceramic Buddha in water; after the little man is soaked you boil your tea water and then poor the boiled water over the Buddha. If he pees the water is perfect, if not the water is either burnt or too cold. Who knew you could burn water? Seems simple enough, however my Buddha didn’t want to pee! The little ceramic instrument of mental torture made me boil water 12 times before releasing a gentle stream of approval from beneath his fat belly. With the perfect boiled water I was ready for my flowering Chinese tea. Watching tea infuse has never quite been so exciting, watching the odd looking ball bloom into a beautiful flower was the pay off I was hoping for. Tea that’s pretty and aromatic is good for the soul, but taking 3 hours to make it is just obscure.

Being sick is not fun for anyone. Being sick and bored is worse. Luckily it’s not a permanent situation and soon I will be up and about again. My husband has been a very good nurse, just a pity he doen’t have a matching outfit. He has been patient, showed the appropriate amount of concern and affection and been firm when I displayed childish behavior. Getting sick, I believe, is your body’s way of forcing you to take a break, slow down and get some much needed rest. If you are anything like me, absolute boredom will also usher you into exploring strange and sometimes silly things to amuse yourself while your body heals. I would love to hear what you get up to when forced to “bed rest”.

Till next time.

Persimmon Diet - Margaret Cho