Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Gays to Blame for Hurricanes and Earthquakes?

In light of Hurricane Sandy hitting the East Coast of the United States this week and some fucktard called John McaTernan (right wing pastor of Defend and Proclaim the Faith Ministries), who blames Sandy on the LGBT community and President Obama for supporting gay marriage.  I could not help but recall this blog post that I wrote last year.  Yes, this is not the first time the queers are being blamed for natural disasters occurring and if you believe these religious nut jobs, you should be very scared of the gays because we can bring shit down.

Gayness” has been blamed for the East Coast tremors in the United States of America this week. Yes, you heard me right! Apparently the influence and extraordinary power of the queers has yet again made the earth move and this time it wasn’t only limited to our bedrooms. Pat Robertson (the crazy televangelist) pinned the blame, in part, on us gays for the 5.8 magnitude earthquake that rattled the East coast. According to him it wasn’t even the gays per se (darnit) , but rather behavior that Robertson labelled “gay-like” that pissed off the almighty and prompted him to smote Americans. As I sigh and roll my eyes, I can only ask the obvious – Really Pat Robertson, Really?
According to Robertson “All across the Eastern seaboard, there are men who get manicures, wear designer eyewear and know about thread counts and God finds this gay-like behavior confusing, and He responded by getting mildly peeved”. Pat did God Skype or Facebook you or something, how do you know this? Surely the CEO of like the whole Universe and such has better things to worry about other than meterosexual men and their God Damn manicures (hmmm... does God really damn manicures?). Secondly, Pat are you a selfish son of a bitch who don’t want people to have nice things? How is getting a manicure, designer eye wear and good linen with a high thread count immoral behavior  It’s called having good taste and good personal grooming something, from the looks of it, you have very little off.

Queerly, Pat went further to warn that people should not get too upset about the earthquake and said “God looks at people who get their panties in a twist after a little shaking, and He says to Himself, ‘Wow, that’s really kind of gay’”. Well, I must concur with God on this one: the twisting of one’s panties and the right kind of shaking is indeed a little gay, especially if done with the right amount of KY and with sufficient thrust. But, then again, I am not sure whether God would be into watching that kind of thing, but maybe you are Pat, you do look like a kinky kind of guy. It’s always the folks who protest too much against homosexuality who are caught paying for male hookers or found blowing guys in public restrooms.
According to Pat the gays can not only cause earthquakes we can also influence the weather. Who knew? I wish someone told me that when the last cold front rolled in. Pat said “If you keep on getting pedicures and facials, you can expect two to three inches of rain and some really hot humid days in your future”. Now let me get this straight. Manicures, sunglasses and knowledge of thread counts causes earthquakes and pedicures and facials causes rain and humidity. Isn’t it amazing how personal grooming, fashion and tasteful decor can be so frightfully immoral and dangerous? We must be teetering on the edge of a very precarious slope. I am shivering in fear hiding behind my Prada sunglasses and surely will have nightmares tonight under my Egyptian Cotton Sheets (thread count 1500 FYI).

I don’t know about you but I am getting rather tired of crazy fundamentalist religious freaks making sweeping statements in public forums. Statements that is fantastical, unfounded, bizarre and insulting to the intelligence of the people who are unfortunate enough to have to listen to them. Robertson falls into the same category as, amongst others, the folks from the God Hates Fags fraternity - the “Let’s scare the shit out of people with our Bullshit and get their money!” category. Shirley Phelps Roper, who periodically sends me tweets on Twitter that does not make any sense, and Pat Robertson could be family as they seem to be peas from the same crazy ass train pod. I am not entirely convinced that their parents didn’t actually fuck each other at some point, but if they did this is the result we are being chastised with.
Blaming natural disasters on the gays is not a new thing. Before it became fashionable to blame the queers by fundamentalist freaks, Communism was the flavor of the month. So I guess the Gays have become the new Communists. The blame game is an age old tradition and has been successfully wielded by many groups, feeding of the fears of society for their own selfish gains. The gain, most times, being to get their greedy little paws on other people’s cash. If you scare enough gullible people (and there are plenty out there) into believing a group or aspect of society is a genuine threat to their way of life and offer them a false sense of security, it is easy to get them to part with their money. And in this day and age it has become easier than ever and it’s rubbing my tits the wrong way!

So, Pat Robertson are you really as stupid as you sound? I guess that is the real question to be asked here. The men who are getting those manicures, pedicures and buying the designer eye wear and to whom thread counts matter in all probability are not stupid enough to be dissuaded by your mindless rants. Mind you, neither is the greater world population either. If I were you, I’d be more worried about what God thinks of your utterances and the words you put in His mouth. I am convinced that He is not at all amused by you making Him sound like a blabbering idiot, and He must be appalled by the state of your cuticles! I am so scheduling a facial and pedicure for next week, we can do with some rain...

Till next time.

Not the actual video (couldn't find it on YouTube), but this gives you a good idea of the freak show that is Pat Robertson.


Pierre le Roux said...

In South Africa a certain Pastor Oscar Peter Bougardt from the Western Cape has now also jumped on the bad wagon saing that South Africa is also cursed because of gay marriage and that we too will be punished as America has been. On his Facebook profile he even went further to say that all homosexuals should be executed. I have reported him to the Human Rights Commission (HRC) for hate speech and this is what I wrote (if you also feel what this man is doing is wrong and is hate speech I urge you to also write to the HRC and lodge a complain):

Dear Adv Mabedle Lawrence Mushwana

I contact you today being very distressed by the behavior and utterances of a man who claims to be a man of God. A man who is respected by the community in which he claims to preach the word of God. A man who is abusing the platform he has been given and instead of building peace, tolerance and respect among the South African people he is spreading intolerance and hate.

This man is Pastor Oscar Peter Bougardt from the Calvary Commission Bible School in Mitchells Plain Cape Town. I first learned of Bougardt during 2011 when he publicly stated that Arch Bishop Desmond Mpilo Tutu was going to burn in hell for supporting gay rights. Over the last year Bougardt has continued to make himself guilty of hate speech against the LGBT community.

I do appreciate that all South African have freedom of speech which we gained trough our hard fought democracy and that all South Africans have a right to their opinions. However, when I person of authority and a person who the community looks up to for spiritual guidance is leading them astray and advocating the execution of a minority group, surely someone should intervene. With the high levels of hate crimes against the LGBT community, especially in the Western Cape, utterances that support or even advocate such violence can promote such crimes from occurring. It is utterly worrisome that Bougardt is advocating such violence against the LGBT community in public forums and even more troublesome that his Church is allowing this to happen.

Bougardt has on his Facebook profile made several troublesome statements which, in my opinion, is hate speech. I urge you to have a look at what he wrote and determine for yourself if this is indeed hate speech or not. If you agree with my view that it is hate speech I humbly urge you to intervene. South Africa has come a long way since 1994 and we really do not need to take steps backwards.

Bougardt's Facebook profile can be viewed through this link: http://www.facebook.com/pastor.bougardt Some of the content that he published on his account is below.

I would like to thank you for your time in reviewing this complaint and hopefully addressing this matter.

Kind regards,
Pierre le Roux

Pierre le Roux said...

Here is some extracts from what he has written copied from his profile:

"President Obama wants the USA to accept homosexual marriages as normal. God spoke through hurricane Sandy, telling them not to mess with mother nature. Marriage is ordained of God and it is between a man and woman. For the USA or any country to accept homosexual marriages as normal is playing with nature, God id using mother nature to deal with evil countries. President Obama won't see another term in office, God will punish him. South Africa wake up, God hate sin, if this government don't scrap perverted homosexual laws, God will deal with SA as He is dealing with the USA. With all the weapons of mass distruction, and all the riches the USA have, they could not stop mother nature. God is God and He will not allow any country no matter how rich or strong to play with Him."

Pierre le Roux said...

To read the rest of his hate speech visit his Facebook page, http://www.facebook.com/pastor.bougardt because they are too long to publish here.

Steve Johnson said...

I have to tell you, Adam and I absolutely caused those Earth tremors. It was a great day to begin with, and Adam was allegorically stabbing a side of beef with his spear. I enjoyed being that side of beef, and I enjoyed Adam's spear even more! The tempest accelerated with much greater ferocity than usual, and as climax came over us both, Adam and I broke through the floor as our mattress plunged into the kitchen below. We lay in bliss as a shock wave crossed the county and ricocheted back again. We had made the Earth move, and it really is Adam and Steve! :)

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